[19] How to Overcome Anxiety

Anxiety.

What feelings arise when you hear that word?

Do you have flashbacks to certain moments in time?

Well today, I’m here to give a core root to anxiety and document step-by-step actionable advice that is applicable to a multitude of different scenarios.

First, we all know what anxiety feels like, and we may even recognize certain people, environments, circumstances, or information that catalyzes us into that state, but do we understand the root of it all?

I’ll share a proposed root.

Take this in, see if it is applicable to you, and throw a comment below for any other ideas that you think I miss.

Alright, so my proposed core root to anxiety is: We have an attachment to an expectation of an outcome that arises when we overthink our response to the response of others.

Alright so that’s the video, I’ll see you all tomorrow…nah I’m just kidding.

That’s a lot in one sentence, so let’s break it in half and break it down backward.

So first, we overthink our response to the response of others.

This is applicable when feeling anxious about anything involving other people.

Think of a time when you felt anxious about having to stand up in class to present or asking a potential partner out on a date, etc.

Originally articulated by Kapil Gupta, the idea is that we don’t truly fear what we have to say, or even what the other person or people will react or respond with.

Rather, deep down, we feel anxious about how WE will respond to the reaction of others.

Now, at first, this may not sound accurate or applicable.

But think about it, when we publicly speak in front of others, do we fear the reaction of the audience or do we fear the feelings that we will have to sit with that arise upon taking in the reaction of others?

If the crowd is booing, is it their boos that bring us anxiety or is it how we react to the boos that bring us anxiety?

Don’t force yourself to agree with this idea, but remain aware of it when you feel anxiety arise due to external influences.

Alright, so now let’s move on to the first part:

We have an attachment to an expectation of an outcome.

In any situation, we know an outcome will happen, and we hope it to be aligned with our goals, whatever they may be.

Let’s go to the example of asking a person out.

The goal, of course, is to have the other person say yes to the date.

With this, we may feel anxiety arise as we approach this person.

And I’m claiming this feeling of anxiety to stem from feeling attached to wanting this person to say yes.

So how do we resolve this problem?

Simply detach.

Well, how?

Recognize that it’s an internal frameshift.

It may be helpful to zoom out and see the situation objectively from the perspective of… it is meant to be, then it will unfold naturally.

Okay, so that’s great and all for dealing with externally arising anxiety, but how about those seemingly random anxiety attacks that so many people deal with.

Let’s say you’re at home, chilling, and you begin to feel a panic attack come on.

First, go within and recognize what route you know is right for you to take:

Option 1 is to escape these feelings and return to your baseline ASAP

and Option 2 is digging deep and uncovering the root of the feelings.

If you want to take flight from these anxious feelings, which is typically chosen when dealing with short-term stressors, like having to go into work tomorrow or tackling a task that you dread, then you will want to stay busy and move around.

Staying busy will ultimately distract your mind. Try any form of art, try practicing a new skill, try organizing your life in whatever way feels right.

In terms of moving around, again, you want to distract your mind, but this time from a physical origin.

Try doing a yoga routine or following along with one online. Stretch your muscles, go for a walk, do some squats or pushups – anything to get that energy spread out throughout your whole body.

The key is to not repress these anxious feelings through technological distractions. Rather, it is important to move through and eventually overcome these feelings in chunks.

And I say in chunks because if you start stretching, half of your focused attention will likely be spent on the physical movements while the other half can digest the thoughts, feelings, and emotions that are coming on from the panic.

If you choose to buckle down and go down route 2 of taking on these feelings head on, then there are measures that can aid in your ability to do so.

For one, play some peaceful solfeggio frequencies. I have a playlist saved on my channel for you to access countless hours worth of vetted videos.

These are background noises to serve as a comfortable anchor for what you’re handling. These sounds are not meant to distract you or fill your mind with external stimuli, rather they are meant to raise your baseline emotional state so when you take on a lot of emotion, you can return to an elevated level.

Next, recognize your natural body language.

Are you curled up on a couch, are you huddling in, or are you standing tall, shoulders back and down, chest up, ready to take on whatever comes your way with unwavering confidence and faith in your ability to survive, overcome, and grow through any experience?

It may be helpful to force your body into a meditative position. Your body will mold your thoughts, so the worst thing you can do is have a scared, defensive body position.

Alright, next: There is benefit in diving head first into where this panic attack is coming from, objectively.

Did you have a major life event, trauma of any kind, sudden change, or something of that sort?

If so, then you may want to speak with a professional, but remember that you are powerful, blessed, and full of joy with the capability of overcoming any challenge, obstacle, or opposition.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

#100Days Kapil Gupta